4 reviews google
5.0 Rating
Lane Stokes
Eleanor R.
3 years ago
My husband and I couldn’t talk about anything without fighting, saying terrible things. We tried two other counselors before Lane and nothing improved. But in one session with Lane, he coaxed from both of us reasons we still love each other and taught us a simple way to talk kindly at home. We both highly recommend Lane Stokes as a marriage counselor. Eleanor R.
Katie Walker
1 review
a year ago
Lane has helped us start to recognize our emotions and how they control our communication. There are so many unconscious triggers that he has been helping us to work through and we have noticed a huge improvement in our communication. Lane has taught us to communicate using our emotions to better understand where the issues actually are.
Response from the owner a year ago
Katie, thank you very much for your kind words. Yours is especially important for others to read because you are so specific in how I have helped. Emotions are one of the most important factors of communication and I’ve found that most people fail to understand that. Then when they find, as you have, that one’s emotions express themselves in ways unique to your personality, they begin to grasp the importance. When they learn that one’s emotions actually trigger other emotions from the past that then replace current ones, they discover why communication in relationship is so difficult. What I have appreciated about the two of you is your courage in facing the challenges of overcoming those many ways your emotions have affected you and your absolute determination to learn how to use your emotions to communicate your love and thoughts. I wish I had a hundred more like you as inquisitive and courageous in overcoming those forces that keep you from having the closeness and love that you desire. I love your sentence about using your emotions to better understand where the issues actually are. I keep telling people that by building additional strength in just a few of the 75 most common personality strengths, they can get what they want in life. You are proof of that statement. You know how important professional help is in finding where to focus your energy in communication instead of wasting precious time trying to figure it out on your own or by reading self help books in hopes of gaining the knowledge. Books are good when people are able to express emotions when they are needed, which most cannot. You have allowed me to pinpoint exactly where you need to focus and so your progress has been rapid. I thank you for your trust in me. And I thank you for helping me build my counseling business by recommending me to others. In our day and age, people want a friend to recommend a counselor. When that is not possible, they turn to reviews. So, your review will serve no telling how many others who are seeking good counseling, especially for love relationships and marriages. Thank you again. Lane
Richard Armour
1 review
a year ago
Lane has the ability to help you understand and interpret your feelings and emotions which in turn gives you the power to overcome much of past pains and feelings of hurt and shame. Easy to talk to.
Response from the owner a year ago
Richard, thank you so much for your kind words. I appreciate when anybody speaks well of me and what I do in a review or recommendation, but I love it more when they pinpoint exactly what I do best. There will be people who read what you are saying who have suffered a long time from past pains and feelings of hurt and shame. I believe from my experience as a counselor that if people were books, each of us would have several chapters telling of hurts, shame, loneliness, bewilderment, guilt, feelings of helplessness and even hopelessness at times. We all have them because to be human is to suffer in so many ways. You have been willing to face yours by choosing counseling, which is no small thing. Most people will never have the courage to open themselves to another, a stranger, to seek solace for their hurts and pain. It’s one thing to talk about your personal life once but to come week after week in order to face the demons of the past takes a big commitment to love yourself and others. You have done that and continue to do so. As you say, I’m easy to talk to. I think that’s a gift my mother bestowed on me as a child that led me into counseling at an early age. I love to listen to people in pain in hopes of helping them find ways to find comfort and peace. I appreciate the fact that you gave me an opportunity to help you find ways to heal your past. Like you say in your review, I have the ability to help you understand and interpret your feeling and emotions…. That is a gift from God for He gives us the ability to love others, even strangers and I am thankful he gave that gift to me. There are days I say to my wife, “I don’t know who that was doing the counseling today because I don’t know how to do that.” She assures me that those 30+ years of talking to people in pain taught me what to say. OK, but it is God who tells me how to say it. Learning to understand the feelings of others takes years. Learning to interpret the feelings of others takes more years. There are things I do today that I couldn’t have done five years ago. Because of your search for yourself in your past and present, you have taught me more that I will now pass onto others. I can’t thank you enough for your working with me to heal your past and give hope for the future. Lane
Ena Edwards
4 reviews
4 years ago
Lane Stokes is kind, patient, supportive, and very knowledgeable.
Response from the owner a year ago
Ena, thank you so much for those kind words. If I could have three words on my tombstone they would be “He was kind.” To me kindness is another word for love. I appreciate your giving me the opportunity to be kind, patient, supportive and use my knowledge to help you. When people call for counseling, I can hear the panic in their voices. It is as though they speak a mile a minute for fear I won’t take the time to listen to them. That’s where the patience comes in. I always have time to listen for as long as it takes and when that becomes apparent, I can hear that in their voices too. To me, counseling is mostly about listening and hearing the meanings of those words. In the beginning of my professional counselor training, I used the Person Centered Method like everybody else. I listened and over time my clients learned what to talk about and how to resolve their own issues. The reason I changed to what I do now is because we modern folks don’t have that much time to contemplate our issues. We’ve all got too much to do, our children have too much to do and it feels like our world is spinning out of control. Good counseling is also expensive and going to appointments is time consuming, so I changed to methods to aid my clients in resolving their issues much sooner. I appreciate the fact that you were willing to trust my methods to help you overcome your problems and get you back to happiness and peace. I also thank you for those who will read your words and find the counseling they need. Reviews are good for our times. People want the recommendations of their friends. When they cannot get those, they rely on reviews. There is no telling how many people you will help with what you have said. For so many, the one thing they want to know is “Does the counselor care about his clients—will he care for me?” You are telling them about a counselor who cares. Thanks to you, I will have the opportunity to care for more of those unknown in need for whom I pray every night. God bless you Ena. Lane
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