The main job of children is to successfully move through all the developmental stages. These are listed by age in a number of sources where parents can read about them. It is very important for them to learn to identify the emotions they feel. Children, like adults, will sometimes have issues that their parents cannot resolve. This is when a professional counselor such as myself will need to be called upon for assistance.
The Eight Skills
I highly recommend that children be taught the eight skills found in my book The Big White Dog with Green Eyes. I wrote this book with children in mind. Parents will spend fortunes on getting their children into the best kindergartens, schools and colleges to give them the best start in life. By learning these eight new relationship skills, children will make new friends easily, become popular because of their abilities to read people and gain leadership opportunities well ahead of their peers.
“Bullying is the New Rape” is an article I wrote years ago. It stated that children who are bullied most often suffer the same traumatic damages that a rape inflicts. Bullying is worse because whereas the rape is a one-time occurrence, bullying usually occurs every day for years by several attackers. It is pure ignorance to think that bullying is a phase all children must go through. Actually, only 16% of children are bullied and their lives ruined forever unless a professional counselor intervenes early. Being bullied too often causes an all-pervasive sense of sadness that leads to suicide. Much worse is the lifetime fear of others anger, rage and confrontation that will control and take away self-assertiveness, self-esteem and self-confidence.
ADHD is another condition parents must look for in early childhood. Forgetfulness, impulse control, emotional regulation, distractibility, hyperfocusing, poor self-esteem, poor social skills, anger and rage are a few of the negative characteristics that must be addressed. When ADHD is suspected, a diagnosis must be attained to distinguish between ADHD and Autism. The longer these symptoms are allowed to continue, the harder they are to control. If all these characteristics are not controlled by adulthood, they will have lasting effects on job performance, lifetime earnings, marital satisfaction and may bring about divorce. In adulthood the symptoms often mimic personality disorders. Parents often wish to use non-medication to treat ADHD. My advice is that during the time it takes for non-medication methods to work the child will lose too much. There are many medications designed to quickly bring the symptoms under control so that counseling methods can be used to bring about behavioral changes.